Friday Science Jokes

1. Why is it so hard to wake up in the morning?
That's because of Newton's First Law – A body at rest wants to stay at rest.

2. I was reading a book on helium. I couldn't put it down!

3. A group of protesters in front of a physics lab:
What do we want? Time travel!
When do we want it? Irrelevant!

4. A frog telephones the Psychic Hotline. His Personal Psychic Advisor tells him:
"You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you."
The frog is thrilled! "This is great! Will I meet her at a party?"
"No," says his advisor, "in her biology class."

5. What did one ion say to another? I've got my ion you.

6. A piece of ice fell in love with Bunsen burner. "Bunsen my flame! I melt every time I see you", said the ice. The Bunsen burner replied, " It is only a phase you are going through".

7.In some foreign country a priest, a lawyer and an engineer are about to be guillotined.
The priest puts his head on the block, they pull the rope and nothing happens - he declares that he's been saved by divine intervention - so he's let go.
The lawyer is put on the block, and again the rope doesn't release the blade, he claims he can't be executed twice for the same crime and he is set free too.
They grab the engineer and shove his head into the guillotine, he looks up at the release mechanism and says, "Wait a minute, I see your problem..."

8. Since light travels faster than sound,
people may appear bright until you hear them speak.